A Blessing in Disguise Disabilities, hardships, challenges, beauty, unpredictability, life--how do all those words relate? I never used to think that those words could all be used in the same sentence. My little cousin Mallory coming into my life opened my eyes to the fact that all those words work together hand in hand. Mallory becoming a part of my family was a blessing and a lesson; she taught me that life is wonderfully unpredictable, and I have to face its challenges every day with an open heart.
I will never forget the first day that I saw Mallory. I went to my aunt’s house to see her new baby. My parents told me on the way there that Mallory had Down Syndrome. I was only seven years old, and I had no idea what Mallory’s disability really meant or what it entailed. My parents explained to me that she was no different than the rest of us no matter what she looked like or what she acted like. At that time she was a baby so there would be no noticeable difference in behavior, just appearance. As she got older, however, she wouldn’t be the same as the other kids her age. She would look differently, talk differently, walk differently, and function differently than the other children. Fortunately, she would also think the same and be loved the same as any other kid. I walked into my aunt’s house; she looked exhausted yet extremely joyful. I would have never guessed how worried she was about Mallory’s future and her own future.
My family knew from the second that we saw Mallory, we loved her just as much as any of the other kids in our family. She was different though. We knew she wasn’t going to grow up the same way as the other kids and growing up was going to be much more challenging for her than they were for other children. What were we supposed to do? How were we supposed to help her get to the intellectual level of the other children? At what pace should she learn things compared to other kids? How were we supposed to know if we were pushing her too hard or not pushing her hard enough? We had so many questions about what her life was going to look like, and we had no way of answering them. We are her family. Aren’t we supposed to know exactly what to do? I have a family full of perfectionists that always know what to do so how could we have no idea what to do now? That’s not normal for us. We always have a plan for whatever situation it is that we are dealing with. This was the first and only time that my family was really at a loss for how to handle our current situation. All we knew was that our love for that little girl was limitless and that we would do anything for her.
As Mallory started to get older, she answered many of our questions for us just by being herself. She brought such a beautiful light to every place that she went and such a wonderful feeling to every person that got to meet her. She had a quality about her that was indescribable. Every task that she set out to do, she would accomplish it with a smile on her face. Even though every situation was much more challenging for her to handle than it would be for other kids, she never failed to smile and push through it. I always admired that about her. She was the same as all the other kids in heart and mind, but she just couldn’t keep up with them mentally or physically. I know that has to be incredibly frustrating but Mallory handles her situation with such grace. She works hard all the time and never complains about a single challenge that she faces (whether she’s aware that her situation isn’t the same as the other kid’s or not). Whether she was trying to learn how to say a word or just simply pick up a toy, she took much more time and effort to accomplish her goal that it would for another child who doesn’t have a disability. That didn’t come close to stopping her though. She would do whatever she had to do and fail as many times as she needed to before finally doing what it was that she had set out to do. I think that’s a quality that I need to work on developing a little more. Mallory having Down Syndrome was definitely a surprise, but she is the biggest blessing we could have ever gotten. She is hands down my favorite person, and she will always be a huge part of who I am. I have learned many lessons from Mallory. The most important lesson being that life is unpredictable, and no matter what gets thrown at people, they must accept it with an open mind and an open heart.